The 3 Most Transformative Things Coaching Taught Me (Guest Blog by Sarah Fulton)
Editor's Note:Â Sarah Fulton facilitates the Coaching Certification cohorts for Bridges Coaching. She and her husband Jordan live in upstate NY with their 5 children. Her heart for coaching comes out in every area of her life and she helps others grow to their full potential.
I have a confession... I have always been kind of scared to parent teenagers.
Maybe itâs all the horror stories: âOh, theyâre cute now, but just wait until theyâre teenagers!â, âTheyâll turn into little monsters that you canât wait to get rid of...â
Have you heard those too?
I knew God had more for me during this season of parenthood.
He wanted to equip me to navigate it well; I just had no idea Iâd find powerful tools for parenting in coach training.
My first coaching course was intended for ministry training. I wanted to learn the most effective way to help people navigate transitions and grow quickly -- and it did that!
I still believe that coaching is the most powerful way to lead people.
But I had no i...
Who On Your List? ~ Bridges Coaching Gifting Guide
Youâre a person who wants to give meaningful gifts and we want to help!
For the first time ever Bridges is opening up our entire product line for Christmas gifting - whoâs on your list?
Pastors, Small Group Leaders, Adult Children, Co-Workers, Aunts and Uncles, Parents and Grandparents?
If youâre like me sometimes it can be hard to find something meaningful to gift. We donât want to just get something to check someone off our list, we want to give something with real value.Â
Hereâs the line-up Bridges is offering:
Traction: This beautifully inspiring workbook uses the same coaching principles from Bridges Life Coach training. Perfect for anyone interested in forward movement: the graduate, the retiree, your small group leader⌠pretty much anyone who wants to move forward in their faith.Â
$29
Soul Care Personal Retreat: 2020 has been rough on all of us. Know someone who may be feeling empty, overwhelmed, or hurting? Offer the gift of the Soul Care personal retreat so they can fee...
BREAKING NEWS: Can We Really Trust Coaching? (Not really... and here's why)
So, does this headline surprise you?!
Hereâs why we canât really trust coaching. (I know it will sound âchurchyâ but I need to say it.) We can really only trust God!
*HOWEVER*
God is trustworthy!
Hereâs what Jesus thought about coaching.
John 14: 16-17 says, âAnd I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth. The world cannot receive him, because it isnât looking for him and doesnât recognize him. But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you.â
Now is that time! The Holy Spirit is available to live within us!
When people are looking for answers and we as leaders give them what we think they should do, we bear the risk of becoming a mediator or âGod-manâ in their lives. This does not mean there isnât a place for teaching - of course, there is, but coaches help people walk out what they have learned.
Real coaches donât tell people what to do, they help them make go...
4 Reasons Why "What's at stake?" May Be Your Best Next Question
"Whatâs at stake?"
Thatâs a great question!
It could be the single straw that is the tipping point between ideation and implementation.
There are 4 basic reasons âWhatâs at stake?â could be the lever needed for forward movement.
Never trying.
Sometimes realizing what will not happen if the idea is kept in the âdream cloudâ is just what is needed to help someone get started and stop procrastinating.
Rightsizing the risk.
Recognizing that if the outcome doesnât end exactly where hoped, the forward movement is at the least good research, and at worst an idea can be crossed off the list to make room for more possibilities to try.
Naming the loss.
Someone needs whatever it is that is being considered! Realizing what could happen if this idea isnât carried out could be just the motivation fuel to get the motion started.
Regret.
Youâll never know if you never try.
Sometimes the big idea works. Sometimes it doesnât, but either way, NOTHING WILL HAPPEN IF NOTHING HAPPENS.
Profound ...
Without These Powerful Questions, Your Coaching Is Just a Good Chat
Okay, I gotta be honest.
I was surprised and thrilled when Dr. Walt Hastings helped take my coaching to a next level with this simple tip.
I first met Walt when he was assigned to assess the recorded coaching sessions I submitted for credentialing. If you know me you know I am a go-big-or-go-home kinda gal and I had it in my head I should go ahead and apply for CCNI Masterâs level credentialing on my first go. Walt was so kind when he let me down easy that I needed a little more work before that level. (I am proud to say I have a CPCC credential now (Certified Professional Christian Coach) and am working toward CMCC this year.)
Waltâs assessment taught me so much that I hired him to do Mentor Coaching for our Bridges Next Level coach training.
In that course, he shared his coaching prep form which shared the simple key I want to share with you today.
Without an articulated outcome your coaching conversation is just a good chat!
A good chat allows the other person to direct the co...
Even If Someone Asks For Advice, The Best Way To Help Them Grow Is Through Coaching
Telling > Teaching > Training > Trusting
Thatâs the growth paradigm we unpack in Coach Training.
Seems so simple at first glance. It goes like this:
When a child is young we tell them, âYou canât cross the road!â
Then we teach them, âDonât cross the road without looking - there may be cars coming!â
Training comes next, where we teach them to look both ways and ask them if there are cars coming.
Then comes the day when we trust them and let them ride their bike to a friendâs house on their own and eventually âconfidentlyâ give them car keys, etc.
Easy right?
But what about topics where the stakes are much higher.
How does it work with issues like choosing a mate, career choices, financial investments, or even walking out a life of faith?
Often when parents of adult children have questions or concerns they revert back to telling or teaching.
Itâs easy to do.
You have such deep concern about your adult childrenâs lives that you want to chime in and âsaveâ them from poor choice...
Asking Is Better Than Telling: 10 Ways Coaching Can Help You
Coaching is a straightforward and powerful tool for unlocking people's desires and dreams.
But it's not for everyone.
Some leaders are used to telling people what to do. In fact, some even enjoy the power and authority they have.
Coaching isn't for these people.
But if you want to...
- empower and enable those you lead to go farther faster
- multiply your impact by raising up mature believers who can hear and respond to what God is speaking
- free your schedule by not holding repetitive meetings with people who are dependent on you
Then coaching is most definitely for you!
Here are 10 ways coaching can help.
10. You donât have to know everything for everyone.
Leaders who tell have to know whatâs best for every situation and each person in order to be effective. Thatâs a lot of stuff to know! (And what if you arenât right?)
9. People love it when you focus on them.
Active listening is the highest form of loving someone. When the focus is on the other person there is a lot les...
Are You Asking Powerful Questions? Eliminate AWKWARD Conversations Once And For All!
Ever have an awkward conversation with a co-worker, client, friend, spouse, child, sibling... really anyone?
Awkward conversations include one or more of the following:
- Rambling one-sidedness
- The same stories over and over
- The same issues again and again
- Shallow skimming - chat about the weather followed by:
- Uncomfortable silence
- Whining
- Blaming
- The expectation of my coming up with an answer or resolution
I used to have conversations with one or more of these elements all the time.
Now, I just ask better questions. Powerful questions even.
In fact, when you have good coaching conversational tools in your tool belt, a lot more than your conversations can change. Awareness can be created. Destinies can be altered. Futures can be gained.
Here are just a few examples that have changed my life and the life of others around me.
- "Where do you want to be in 5 years?"
- "Whatâs holding you back?"
- "What would your life look like if 'that' was no longer an issue?
- "If you say ...
8 Ways Bridges Differs From Other Training Courses
Simply put, our Bridges training courses were designed with you -- the trainee -- in mind.Â
Here are 8 ways Bridges courses differ from many, or even most, training courses.
No. 1 -- At Bridges, we take very seriously how we certify our trainees.
All our cohort courses require individual interaction where we are looking for each personâs grasp of the concepts.
No. 2 -- We give personal attention to the trainee.
All of our training is face-to-face, not voice-to-voice. Not sure what that means? Many, maybe even most, coach training or destiny discovery courses meet the credentialing requirement for voice-to-voice through group phone calls.
No dis, but I have been on some of those phone calls and have not had the greatest experience. While technically it is live training, there were almost always too many people on the call to feel individually connected, AND oftentimes the trainer would ask someone to respond and they were not even there or it took a long time for them to respond. ...
4 Reasons People Put Off Destiny By Design, And How They Felt Later
Â
Here are 4 reasons weâve seen people put this off and then how they felt about it later.
1. âI canât really afford it at this time.â
or:
âWhy didnât I find the money? I would have saved so much if I knew where I was going instead of wasting it on other pursuits.â
2. âI donât really have time for this right now.â
or:
âIf I waited until I âhad timeâ Iâd have to wait till I retire. Iâm so glad I made time. This changed the course of my life.â
3. âIâm not sure if I really need this.â
or:
âIf only I knew then what I know now, it could have been so much different. I didnât know what I didnât know â if that makes sense.â
4. âWhat if I donât really have anything unique in me to dig into?â
or:
âI had no idea I thought so differently from others or had unique passions and giftings. I feel so compelled to be me now!â
Which reason fits you best right now?
How will you feel on the other side of this?
Is it time to join in before this season launches?