3 Steps to Navigating Negative Emotions: Processing Series
Life has storms - external and internal. Negative emotions are never fun, but they are important. They are like a gauge on your life dashboard alerting you to pay attention to something. Good coaching can assist with learning how to manage and mine them.
Here are some options that may help you or someone you are working with.
- Name the feeling. This is so valuable! Some times there is a general sense of malaise and starting with naming it can help you with addressing it well. Chip Dodd's book "The Voice of the heart" and his free emotional resource materials can help, but simply taking the time to identify what your gauge is saying is helpful. Are you sad, angry, lonely, fearful, hurt or something else? (This is the R- recognize part of the Coaching ROAD)
- Consider your options. It could be anything from counseling to a distracation to a release. Talking to someone usually helps reveal the next step, when you hear yourself or someone say something like, "What is need is a good cry" ...
Maybe We Are Asking The Wrong Question(s)
When "stuff" happens, the go-to question for most of us is typical. "Why?"
Why did "that" happen?
Why did someone pass early? Why did that tragedy happen? Why did I lose my job? Why can't I meet someone? Why am I misunderstood?Â
WHY IS THIS HAPPENING!?
Job was never given a clear understanding of why he was dealt such a bad hand. Can you imagine? All your children die in one fell swoop? Your businesses fail, your stock investments tank, you are in utter familial and financial devastation, and then... then you trun up with horrid boils all over your body?Â
Just yuck.
Job spent some time asking some questions, and then God showed up and started asking some questions of His own. Turns out God doesn't report to us. He's not American and has His own definition of fair.
He is God, we are not. And yet He allows, even invites, us to interact with Him. To pour out our hearts. The psalms are full of this kind of dialogue.Â
God wants to hear from us, but He does not "report" to us. We c...
Do You Have A Chapter To Reframe?
During a Sabbatical some years ago, my husband Eric focused on processing different chapters in his life. He would journal about a certain season and what was going on circumstantially. Then, he would ponder his decisions and how he walked through them, paying special attention to what God was teaching him through what happened.Â
He saw a pattern.
Looking back, he could see God at work more clearly than when he was in the middle of whatever was happening.Â
What he was doing was so valuable! He thought he was doing it just for himself, or to pass the journaling on to our grandchildren, but I wondered if more people could get something out of it. So, we decided to publish it. He added pondering questions to the end of each chapter, and just last week, someone walked up to me in church and said, "I feel like I know you - I've been reading Eric's book and walking through your story."Â
What about you? Is there a chapter in your personal history where you could see more clearly now what ...
The Many Faces Of Failure...
What first comes to your mind when you think of failure?
Here are some initial ideas: unkind words, poor behavior, missed deadlines, and loss of trust.
Perhaps some lesser-recognized failures could be: unreceived forgiveness, unrealized potential, procrastination, and stagnation.
My heart is heavy just thinking of categories. There is so much pain and loss in this world.Â
But take heart friends, there is NOTHING God cannot redeem. He truly wants to meet us right where we are and walk with us toward our best next step.
We are in good company. Let's take a look at a few Biblical characters who walked through some difficult situations, failures even, and moved on to redeemed situations.Â
Moses took matters into his own hands and tried to become who God wanted him to be his own way. He was too early and he was out of line. He even murdered a man. And yet, he allowed God to process his heart and he was still asked to be the deliverer God had planned for him to be - in God's timing and...
What Does Success Look Like To You?
If you take Coach Training with Bridges you will learn about Active Listening and Asking Powerful Questions. We'll talk through defining someone's focus and teach you how to assist with making SMART goals- quality action steps, but we hope that the BIGGEST TAKEAWAY for all our trainees is our definition of success. Put simply:
Success is an active relationship with God.Â
Completing an accomplishment is great. Good Coaching certainly helps people with forward movement, but as believers achieving goals cannot be our primary motivation. Our worth is not in whether or not we get "there" or get "that" done in our lifetime, our worth comes from our adoption into the family of God. It comes from our connection with a settled place with our Father in eternity.
At Bridges Coaching when an action step does not result in the desired outcome we say, "'Failure' is good research." But true "failure" is not having a soul connection with God. His Spirit is in us longing for connection.Â
When we pr...
Dealing With “That” Song... when your reality doesn’t line up with the promises
Maybe it’s just me, but sometimes when I sing a song that says something like “He won’t fail” it kind of sends me into a bit of a tailspin. (Or maybe it’s the one that says, “God is good, good, so good...”)
I think of so many situations that still really hurt, or are confusing, or didn’t happen, and it makes me feel awkward singing a song like that. Â
Here are some situations that come to my mind:
- The accident that took young parents from their children.
- The couple that birthed a still-born child after years of infertility.
- The man who prayed for healing but still deals with chronic pain.
- The family who felt like God was guiding them to launch a business, but it’s been years and the business is just making it.
- The person who faced a trauma well, but then slowly drifted from active faith.
- Someone waiting ... for a transplant, or a husband, or a baby or ...
- The woman who is diligently trying to make an impact but often feels put off and misunderstood.
And the list could go ...
Soul Care Personal Retreat! (What have you done for YOU lately?)
These last two years..... What can you say?
The whole pandemic season was unexpected, challenging, disruptive, and costly in so many ways!
Now what - how do we heal? what does "normal" look like?
God never wants to waste anything. He always wants to use what we have been through, or are going through, for GOOD in our lives.
We want to help you process what you have experienced!
Bridges Coaching is offering a FLASH SALE for our Soul Care Personal Retreat! for just $20.
What's a refresh worth to you?
What have you done for YOU lately? Maybe it's time to spend some time with God, truly process what is in your heart and listen for what is in His heart for you. This self-paced video journey gives you prompts for processing and helps you lean into your own personal refreshing journey!
AND who could you gift a REFRESH to? Maybe your pastor could use a personal retreat, or maybe your boss or coworker, perhaps an adult child or good friend.Â
Use the code FLASHSALE for the $47 discount...