Which Her Do You See? (Relational perspectives that aren't really helpful.)
Ever heard of the word "infantizing"? If you haven't heard it, I can almost guarantee you have experienced it. It means treating someone likeĀ a baby or younger than they actually are.
It happens all the time, and especially in relationships that began with a caregiving aspect where one person is older, more experienced, or educated. Here are some examples.
- Parents have a difficult time allowing their adult children to make adult choices. It can vary anywhere from "Don't you want to wear a coat?" to "Are you sure you want to take out a loan to start that business?" Well-meaning questions that have a sense of "I-know-better" in them.
- Leaders who were there when someone first came to faith. In this relationship, it is more difficult to know when a person is no longer a "baby". These interactions sound like, "Wanna know what I would do if I were you?", or maybe they are not even questions at all - they are tells. "You can't be angry like that anymore," or "You need to forgive."
- Older ...
3 Ways To Help Them Write Their Chapter
We are all writing our own stories. Each time we make a decision or avoid one, we are writing a new paragraph or starting a new chapter.Ā
Whether we like it or not. Each day adds to the story. Some parts are comfortably predictable. One of my favorite parts is the end of the day when I sit in our loveseat and press the recline button, and the footrest comes out. There's a sense of rest that brings a satisfying "Ahhhh."
Some chapters are long-awaited, where we've saved up and planned for them - like a baby, a vacation, or even retirement. Other chapters come as a shock - like a sudden career shift, a loss, or an accident. Some are a good surprise - like a new relationship, a windfall or gift of some sort, or a hoped resolution coming to pass.
All chapters have choices.Ā
Every story has a crisis. (Do you remember learning that in grade school?) Some crises come to us, and others are chosen, but every story has something that is happening in it. Every chapter is a small part of a bigg...
How Are Your People Doing?
We all have people. Think of your circles. You have co-workers, neighbors, friends from your past, current friends, and family members younger than you and older.Ā
You interact with them in different ways. Maybe some you just wave to, but most you have some sort of conversation with. Those are the ones we are talking about today.Ā
Conversations make up the majority of our interactions with others.
How are your conversations going?
Are some repetitiveĀ - where they share the same "things" over and over, and you wish you could help them get unstuck?
Are some wistful - where they talk about their dreams, but they don't seem to be moving toward them?
Are some shallow - where you wish you could go deeper, but you aren't sure how?
Are some sad - where you want to offer hope, but they can't seem to break through?
The Coaching paradigm can help!
Coach training isn't just for aspiring professionals (but we set them up well too). Coach principles have shifted many stale conversations and...
Your "Best Saturday" Self
Some Saturdays are filled with stuff to do, or places you have to be, but those are not the ones we are talking about here. Let's focus on those wonderful Saturdays when there's white space... They are probably rare, but also probably wonderful.
Close your eyes with me for a minute and remember that time when you weren't quite sure what to do - the to-do list was blank and so was the calendar and you had that rare thought, "What do I want to do today?"
That's the feeling of Sabbath rest.Ā
It's a time when you just enjoy life, you connect with your Creator and likely His creation, you are not in a hurry, you eat good food, and have the luxury of time for quality conversation. Your soul sighs, "Ahhh....." in the satisfied kind of way.Ā
Your Best Saturday self celebrates a week well spent.
Your Best Saturday self enjoys the present and takes a break from thinking about what's coming up.
There is no worry, anxiety, or concern there. It's a true break from the work week and the weight...
3 Ways To Keep That One Holiday Conversation From Getting Highjacked!
Not looking forward to certain conversations over the holidays? Let's talk about that friend or family member who is stuck. They have been thinking about doing something new or moving toward a goal, but they've been hovering around the idea or stuck in the hurt or habit for months, or maybe even years...
What if that holiday conversation could be something you looked forward to?
What if you could reframeĀ that tricky topicĀ as an opportunity to connect with God by sharing His deep love for that person?Ā
What if you could slow down and feel Him close, for yourself, during this season?
The possibilities for engaging with the Light during this season are more available than you may realize. If you seek Him, He can be found! Here are 3 simple tips that could make all the difference!
1- ReleaseĀ control!
What?! I hear it. You don't think you want to control others, that sounds so.... controlling. What you really want is for them to "get unstuck", find traction and be able to move from wh...