The #1 Enemy Of Trust And Safety - Coaching Core Competency #4

Coaching Core Competency #4 is Cultivates Safety and Trust

It's just natural to judge. If we are honest we all have thoughts about others. We think they should move faster, prioritize differently, be more at peace, have more fun, or be more focused... and the list could go on!

We are all uniquely designed! (You can learn more about that here if you like. We are planning a new cohort launch soon!) We all have differing strengths and weaknesses, different callings and priorities.

If you have kids or grandkids it is quite evident. Some are quiet, some are competitive, some are artistic, and some are naturally funny. God did that. He made us all different. 

And then He gave us free will. 

Some of us go after goals hard and fast and others choose to focus on enjoying life. Neither is right or wrong if they are not in an extreme. 

So what does this all mean in coaching?

As we explore Core Competency #4 Cultivates Safety and Trust, it means we provide a place where the...

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Did You Miss It As Bad As I Did? Unpacking Core Competency #3

Core Competency #3: Establishes and Maintains Coaching Agreements

Full disclosure I didn't get this one as clearly as I get it now till after the course I designed called Next Level Coach Training. It was kind of embarrassing, and I was kind of doing it right, but this competency is the one I learned about most from the Mentor Coaches who work with our trainees in this course.

Our entry-level coach training, Coaching Culture, offers Life Coach certification and in that course we focus on making sure coaches know how to set up a contract for engaging an actual client. We work through a Welcome Packet and talk through what a session should look like. 

I used to think that was the majority of what it meant to have a quality coaching agreement, but we were just getting started. This is simply the first part of this competency - establishing a coaching agreement.

I had been trained to offer the client choices on their focus and to define what we were going to talk about. Then...

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What Other Mindsets Are There? Coaching Core Competency #2

Coaching Core Competency #2: Embodies a Coaching Mindset. 

Coaching is not the only way to approach spiritual development, forward movement, or solution generation, but it may be the best one for many situations. And possibly the most overlooked or misunderstood.

Here are a few ways we talk about it at Bridges Coaching.

1) We define the difference between Coaching and Counseling, Mentoring and Consulting. They all have their place. They all can be healthy. And they all are different.

In a nutshell:

  • Counseling is more diagnostic and prescriptive, it helps people deal with their past as it affects their present. Coaching may help people to uncover what has been holding them back, but it is a joint process rather than a professional reading the situation and determining how best to move forward.
  • Mentoring is more like apprenticing. It is a passing off of a skill or helping another person experience something common for the caregiver.
  • Consulting is bringing in an expert for their...
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The "Sexy" Coaching Core Competency #1

Coaching, as an industry, is not just a loosey-goosey way of conversational growth. There are specific guidelines called "Competencies" that are the foundation for what coaching entails, both in the secular applications and in Christian arenas.

The gold standard for coaching is the International Coaching Federation (ICF), they set the standards for credentialing worldwide. Bridges Coaching has chosen to align with Christian Coaches Network International (CCNI) which extrapolates all the ICF Coaching Core Competencies sharing how they are Biblical-based and used to forward the kingdom.

At Bridges Coaching we believe coaching makes disciples not dependents and in this coaching competencies series, we will dig into why we feel so strongly about that statement.

The first Core Competency is "Demonstrates Ethical Practice". In know, "Sexy" right? But the truth is that without ethical practice, coaching is just loosey-goosey.

Not everyone who says they are a coach...

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Guest Blog: Applying Working Genius To Your Real LifeĀ 

My daughter Natalie has been leaning into the Working Genius model and wrote this blog with a real-life story and application. If you are an inventor, galvanizer, or discerner this will be of special interest, but don't just think personally - you coach, work with, and have family members who are inventors, galvanizers, and discerners too! Hope you get as much out of it as I did!

[That's Natalie and her husband, Mike, in the picture.] Here's her blog:

Have you been reading the genius blogs and wondering how can this apply to real life? What if I am the only participant at my workplace or in my family who is interested in this topic? Especially if your genius is not galvanizing. 

Fear not, I am a galvanizer. Wait discerners, don’t go anywhere… this blog is actually for you. As an inventor and galvanizer, I am attracted to discerners… my husband, several former bosses, and many of my closest friends. Often times I have felt that I cause them distress,...

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Is The Scale The Answer?

What your scale tells you is just data. It gives you a fact - the honest truth about your weight.

The scale can be your friend if it tells you something you like, or your enemy if it doesn't. But the truth is the scale is just a tool to help you see what really is.

For me the scale is motivation!

If I like what I see it is motivation to keep up the good work, and if I don't like what I see it is a reminder that true change will take intentionality.

That's the bottom line really.

Change rarely happens by accident. It's hardly ever a surprise. 

If I don't like what I see I have two options, well three maybe.

1) I can choose to do something about what I see.

This will include making a plan for an alternative outcome. It will likely include some trial and error, some intentionality and grit, and will probably require a realistic look at a reasonable timeline for effecting change.

2) I can avoid seeing and just not weigh myself anymore.

This plan will avoid...

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Simple Success: Is Content Deficit Really The Problem?

In these days of Google, kindle, and podcasts on demand, we live in a content-rich environment. if you want to know more about something all you need to do is ask SirI or Alexa!

I'm not sure if I have ever heard anyone wistfully say, "If only I knew where or how to get more information on that..."

I know a lot more than I do. 

What if a plan is really what is needed? Here are a two actual (and perhaps too personal) examples.

Here's what I know - what I have done - and what I am doing now.

I know sugar is not great for my ultimate weight loss goal, but knowing and doing something about it are two different things. When I took an honest assessment I found I had way too many exceptions for why I should go ahead and have that latte or late-night snack. I don't need more information about sugar, I need an actual plan to remove it or reduce it from my life..

     My current SMART goal is that I can have sugar in my morning coffee, but then I need to lay off...

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Next Coach Training Cohort Forming Now

The focus of this blog is usually to bring a reminder or value add regarding coaching culture in real life. We try to share from different perspectives how coaching can be used in different arenas.

Today's post will be different. (If you have already taken coach training, could I ask that you forward this to someone who would benefit?)

This post is time-sensitive since our next coaching cohort registration closes soon! I feel compelled to share a little about what coach training actually is - who would be interested, what is included, what you can expect, how much it costs, and most importantly the timing involved.

Who would be interested?

     You! If you want to learn more about growing in your faith journey and helping others to grow in theirs, coach training could be your best next step. If you have relationships in your life where you would like to have more significant conversations, coach training will give you tools to upgrade your connections.


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What's In Your Next Chapter?

Every good story has a plot.

Every great movie has a crisis that needs to be resolved.

But there are bad stories and bad movies too. The top two complaints are either that it is boring or does not end well.

What kind of a story will this next year be for you?

Will be boring? More of the same 'ol, same 'ol? Will it have a sad ending, or one that does not resolve a crisis, or accomplish a great goal?

There is a blank page waiting for you to write on it.

Coaching helps people write the story they want to read at the end of the year.

If you would like help with your story consider coaching from one of our Associate Coaches or get our Traction book for some self-guided coaching. 

Or if you want to help people write their stories well, Coach Training will give you the tools to help people move toward their preferred future! The next cohort starts soon! (Click the "I'm Interested" button for more info!)

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'23 Reflection Questions & '24 Vision Questions

I wrote some end-of-the-year questions for our church and wanted to share them here as well.

Check out these thought-provoking questions and conversation prompts for this holiday season! Use them on your own, in a family group, or at your New Year's party.

2023 Reflections:

  • What one event stands out to you that marks this last year – maybe something you are grateful for, something you overcame, or a little of both?
  • What relationships were significant for you this last year?
  • When did you have the most fun?
  • Was there a verse or phrase that was especially meaningful?
  • What fruit of the spirit marked your year? (Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, Self-Control).

2024 Vision: 

  • What brings you joy and how could you do more of it in this next year?
  • Who is one person you could invest in this next year and how could that make a difference in their life?
  • What accomplishment would you like to start or complete this next year?
  • Where is one...
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