Asking Is Better Than Telling: 10 Ways Coaching Can Help You

Coaching is a straightforward and powerful tool for unlocking people's desires and dreams.

But it's not for everyone.

Some leaders are used to telling people what to do. In fact, some even enjoy the power and authority they have.

Coaching isn't for these people.

But if you want to...

  • empower and enable those you lead to go farther faster
  • multiply your impact by raising up mature believers who can hear and respond to what God is speaking
  • free your schedule by not holding repetitive meetings with people who are dependent on you

Then coaching is most definitely for you!

Here are 10 ways coaching can help.

10. You don’t have to know everything for everyone.

Leaders who tell have to know what’s best for every situation and each person in order to be effective. That’s a lot of stuff to know! (And what if you aren’t right?)

9. People love it when you focus on them.

Active listening is the highest form of loving someone. When the focus is on the other...

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Are You Asking Powerful Questions? Eliminate AWKWARD Conversations Once And For All!

Ever have an awkward conversation with a co-worker, client, friend, spouse, child, sibling... really anyone?

Awkward conversations include one or more of the following:

  • Rambling one-sidedness
  • The same stories over and over
  • The same issues again and again
  • Shallow skimming - chat about the weather followed by:
  • Uncomfortable silence
  • Whining
  • Blaming
  • The expectation of my coming up with an answer or resolution

I used to have conversations with one or more of these elements all the time.

Now, I just ask better questions. Powerful questions even.

In fact, when you have good coaching conversational tools in your tool belt, a lot more than your conversations can change. Awareness can be created. Destinies can be altered. Futures can be gained.

Here are just a few examples that have changed my life and the life of others around me.

  • "Where do you want to be in 5 years?"
  • "What’s holding you back?"
  • "What would your life look like if 'that' was no longer an issue?
  • "If you say 'Yes' to...
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Top Ten Reasons Coaching Works Better Than Telling

Everyone can use the coaching paradigm! Here’s 10 reasons why:

10) You don’t have to know everything for everyone.

Leaders who tell have to know what’s best for every situation and each person in order to be effective. That’s a lot of stuff to know! (And what if you aren’t right?)

9) People love it when you focus on them.

Active listening is highest form of loving someone. When the focus is on the other person there is a lot less pressure on the coach to solve issues. It is way easier to be curious, trust the Holy Spirit and listen than to have to diagnose and prescribe.

8) Relationship trumps regimen every time.

God designed us to be in relationship with Him and others. When we reduce leadership to telling people what to do, we can easily “cookie cutter” people by categorizing them and offering a rules pathway to results rather than connecting relationally to walk through life with them.

7) Anyone can do it.

Tools needed for coaching are a...

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Five Surefire Ways To Stifle A Quality Conversation

Are you looking for ways to shut someone down while they are sharing?!

Probably not, but it’s almost too easy to do without knowing.

Check out these tongue-in-check conversation killers to see if you are guilty of stifling a quality conversation.

1) One up their story – Your story is probably better or worse than theirs and likely a lot more interesting. So, see if you can get them to stop sharing by telling your similar story with more color or finesse. See if you can get them to feel guilty since your have gone through something far more difficult or silly for celebrating since your deal was grander!

2) Interrupt – Cut to the chase by finishing their sentences for them. This will save time and keep them from having to find words that truly express what they are thinking or feeling.

3) Jump to conclusions – You probably know what’s going on in their life better than they do, so go ahead and decide in advance of hearing them out. This will help them...

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