Meet Kent: Bridges Alumni, Coach, Author and Originator
What's an originator? I'm glad you asked. (I may have made up the word.) An Originator is someone who creates original content. They have their own IP (Intellectual Property - I didn't make that one up.)
Kent originated the REST assessment and offers it for free! I would encourage you to take the assessment, but first let's hear his coach training story.
How did you first hear about coach training?
Honestly, two things were happening. First, I had been hearing about the coaching paradigm for a few years and had some respected friends who raved about it, including some friends who had trained with Bridges Coaching, and it piqued my interest. Being a voracious learner and practitioner, I get excited to learn new leadership skills. Second, I was kind of frustrated with old ministry paradigms. I wanted to see people get breakthroughs, but realized the old discipleship paradigm of “telling” doesn’t work with every personality. Additionally, had been thinking about doing coach training fo...
This Just In - Commentary On Coach Training
In the Bridges Life Coach certification course, we use a variety of adult learning techniques, and one of them is online discussion. We share different questions throughout the learning process so the trainees can interact with the material and process it by restating it, or sharing how it applies in their own life situations.
Among other things, we share about topics like why it is often hard to trust that God has a plan, what it looks like to actively listen in a real life situations, or how to ask empowering questions.
The following comment came from a list-building question requesting input on honest reasons we like to retain control. The trainee's words are in blue and italics.
I take control because apparently I know what's best for everyone!! I never knew I was such a know-it-all all when it comes to other people's lives! But it is out of concern and wanting what is best for them.
I love the honesty here! Whether we acknowledge it or not, most of us do think we know what...
Two SIMPLE Phrases That Flip The Conversation To A Coaching Mindset
There is a skill set to coaching, to be sure, but more than a skill set, coaching is a mindset.
More than following a formula, coaching* has to do with a heart posture that believes God's Spirit endwells people and is guiding each of us on our own unique journey. A good coach is a thinking partner who offers a safe space to process your pathway out loud. They are cheerleaders and sometimes mirror holders. They believe in your ability to work through whatever life has thrown at you, to do new things, to work through obstacles, and to follow through when the going gets tough.
Two super simple phrases that can be a game-changer in a coaching session or a conversation.
1) Tell me more.
Tell me more - offers the person replying to go anywhere they want to go in what they share next. In fact, they may not even know until they keep talking what they need to "get out" there to discuss.
Proverbs 20:5 says, "People’s thoughts can be like a deep well, but someone with understanding can f...
Top Ten Things Coaching Is NOT!
Maybe it is easier to say what coaching is not.... Here's a top ten we use in coach training.
Top Ten Things True Coaching Is NOT! (as per the International Coaching Federation and the Christian Coaching Network International - check out the What Is Coaching Blog)
#10 Coaching is not “One-size-fits-all”. It is not a program or plan that the Coach designs and offers to all. Coaching is individualistic because it recognizes that what worked for one person may not work for the next. Each person has a unique design and pathway. Coaching helps uncover that plan.
#9 Coaching is not diagnostic. Good Coaches do not decide what the problem is or what the focus should be, they ask good questions and help the person being coached to come to an “Ah Ha” moment where they recognize something on their own.
#8 Coaching is not prescriptive. People often want someone to just tell them what to do. (I know there are plenty of times in my life when I have wanted that.) Coaching does not tell. Inste...
What Is Coaching? [The Skinny and The Blunt Truth]
"What is Coaching?" I whispered to the rep from Southwestern Christian University when I was considering getting my Master's there.* I was a little embarrassed that I didn't really know.
How about you? Coaching is a buzzword and has been steadily gaining popularity since I first asked that question over 15 years ago.
Webster's primary definition for coaching is the noun version - like Cinderella's coach, or a stagecoach from the Wild West. In that case, coaching is a means to get from one place to another - like our modern-day Uber or Lyft. The second definition Webster gives is "a tutor" or "one who instructs or trains".
Here's the blunt truth. No one owns the word "coach," and it is used differently by different people. The first thing that probably comes to most people's minds is some sort of sports coach, or maybe a skills coach that trains you in a specialty area. Some nutrition and fitness coaches would fall into this definition as well. These type of coaches have their own pa...
Before We Move On...
Last time we talked about R for Recognition on the Bridges Coaching ROAD and how the Discernment plays a crucial role there. (If you missed it, here's the link.)
I feel compelled to go a little deeper before we move on.
Taking plenty of time to establish the "Why" of the chosen destination (read goal) of the ROAD you are going down should not be downplayed.
Consider your potential goal and ask some of these questions:
- What will it cost me to follow through and complete this?
- What will completing it give me?
- If I don't do it, what will that cost?
- Who else will "pay" for this choice? Is it worth it for them?
- Is now the right time?
- What makes this important to me?
- How could this affect other areas of my life?
- Is there anyone I should talk this through with?
Some of these questions were included in the "P's to knowing God's will worksheet" in the first blog, but for those who may not have downloaded it I felt they should be included.
Perhaps it would be helpful to list s...
6 Key Components In Quality Coach Training
What actually happens in Bridges Coach Training? Here we go!
You'll meet online 3 times for a group class with all who are in your cohort at the beginning, middle, and end of your training. In between those gatherings, you will meet with your peer partner and your facilitator, also likely online - which makes distance not a problem and eliminates travel time. Our low ratios of trainer to trainee are unparalleled.
1) We start with a clear definition of coaching.
There are many definitions, and different concepts, about what "coaching" really is. A fair amount of our trainees came to us because they felt they were good at guiding people to what they should do. Sports Coaches do that. Leadership Consultants often interchange the word "coach" with what they do.
At Bridges Coaching, we align with the International Coaching Federation (ICF) and Christian Coaches Network International (CCNI), whose definitions do not include any form of telling others what to do, but rather providing a...
Working Genius & Coaching [Tenacity]
We're on the home stretch now! The final letter in Working Genius is T for Tenacity!
Working Genius says this about it. "The natural gift of pushing projects or tasks to completion to achieve results."
This is one of my geniuses and I have a love/hate relationship with the concept. I mean I don't go out of my way to notice things not getting completed, I just can't help but see them and have a strong desire to see things through.
Most often this is a gift and a value add, but sometimes it isn't perceived that way or received well, or it is just too much.
Once I was called a "pusher" by a well-meaning colleague, and it stung a little. I mean I wouldn't have to push if things were being completed right? ... just saying...
Working Genius has helped me so much! Having Tenacity as a genius can be used for good as a means of follow through making sure things don't get dropped, but it can also be a handful. It's truly hard for me to just let things go without express direction.
That'...
What (exactly) Is Coaching?
Coaching has become somewhat of a buzzword in ministry circles and in the business world. It's trendy to say you are "coaching" someone, or getting "coached".
But what does "coaching" really mean?
First off let's be clear that no one owns any word and we all know words can mean more than one thing. In fact, we have all seen words grow to mean different things in our lifetimes. Over the last few years, our society has morphed the meaning of some of the following words:
Masked, Essential, Agenda, Woke, Lockdown, Triggered...
Please stop for a moment and take a deep breath before we go on.
No need to get wound up, I'm just trying to make a point that when someone thinks of "woke" they no longer simply think of when their alarm clock went off, or in many circles, the word "agenda" does not simply apply only to what you will be talking about in an upcoming meeting.
It's similar, but not the same with the word "coaching".
Coaching always includes some sort of forward movement. Thi...
Follow Your Heart! But On The Other Hand...? [PENDULUM POST]
I'm learning to discern more. You'd think I'd be better at it by now, but it turns out I'm still learning. For me, following my heart means having the "courage" to call things out when I see them. I have the compulsion to set things right. I feel culpable to say what I see, especially as a leader. I almost always feel I am missing the mark if I don't say something when I hear or see something out of line.
(Feels kind of judgy when I say it like that... maybe because it sometimes is judgy and that's where the Pendulum Process needs to come in!)
Is it always right to say something?
Is it never right to step in?
Sometimes it is "courage" that is needed and I do indeed need to speak up. After all, Proverbs 9:8b says,
"... But correct the wise, and they will love you."
Yet, at other times we are encouraged to be wise by not speaking up. Proverbs 10:19b says,
"...if you are wise, you will keep quiet."
So what's a gal to do? Let's take a look at the Pendulum process.
The Pe...