How Word Pictures Can Shift Worldviews
"A picture is worth a thousand words" is really true, maybe even more so for word pictures!
God used word pictures throughout the Bible. He compares His care to being a shepherd, His strength to being a strong tower, and His forgiveness to making us whiter than snow - to name a few. Jesus was a big fan of word pictures as well. In fact, it seems He used what was around Him to share kingdom principles more often than direct teaching. Maybe because word pictures stick in our minds? They are easy to recall and often add depth to a concept's meaning. Think about the yeast in the dough, the vine and the branches, the seed sown in different kinds of soil, - we could go on and on.
It should come as no surprise, then, that God still wants to reveal truth to us through word pictures.
In my own life, I can recall many times when a word picture has helped me anchor my soul in a time of need. I remember one time when I was particularly overwhelmed. I was writing curriculum and recording lesso...
Coaching Tools And How They Can Help
All good coaching allows the person being coached to choose their pathway, and most good coaching allows the "client" to choose the goal.*
But what happens when the person being coached really isn't sure how to move forward? Maybe they don't know what goal they want, or maybe they aren't sure how to take steps forward. Let's take a look at both scenarios.
1) Choosing a goal
At Bridges, we share three ways to choose a goal. The first is a tool called the Bridges Coaching Wheel of Life. It offers a personal evaluation process that provides a well-rounded view of a person's satisfaction in various areas of their life. Click the green link above for your FREE copy. We also offer an expanded version in our Life On Purpose personal workshop or the Traction book.
The second is taking a dream out of the "dream cloud," planting it in the ground, and tending it. That could mean anything from a project like writing a book to adding on to your home, or pursuing an education or a promotion. Th...
Does True Coaching Include Coaxing?
Merriam-Webster defines coaxing as: the act of gently and persistently persuading someone to do something using patience, kindness, flattery, or encouragement. Instead of using force or coercion, it involves appealing to someone's emotions or offering small incentives to overcome their reluctance.
So, does coaching include coaxing? The answer isn't as clean-cut as you may think.
A coach is a thinking partner. Their job is to come alongside someone to create a conversational space where the person can move forward in an area they choose to focus on. Remember, the word coaching comes from the idea of forward movement. "Coaching" from one place to another - like a stagecoach taking people from one place to another.
The person chooses to get coached to move from where they are to another place. That place could include anything from a specific project goal to a mindset shift, or from making a quality decision to walking through a transitional season l. Truly, any forward movement can ...
Coaching For Everyday Conversations
If you know coaching, you probably know at least some of the basic tenets. In our Coaching culture training, we dig into the pillars of Active Listening and Asking Powerful Questions. This alone is most often an intense culture shift. It's much more common to offer a solution based on our own education or experience than to be present for someone and offer a space for them to talk through their situation.
And yet we all love to be heard.
And most of us prefer not to be told what to do. (Check out the blog on the "instawall".)
In our Life Coach Certification, we give trainees three goals for their first coaching sessions:
1. Ask the person being coached to come with a focus.
2. Ensure the person being coached does most of the talking (80% goal)
3. Complete the coaching with an action step of some sort - even if it is to come back to the next session with a list of possibilities
All these are valuable practices, but not very common.
*Try it! If you are not yet coach-trained, ...
Meet Kent: Bridges Alumni, Coach, Author and Originator
What's an originator? I'm glad you asked. (I may have made up the word.) An Originator is someone who creates original content. They have their own IP (Intellectual Property - I didn't make that one up.)
Kent originated the REST assessment and offers it for free! I would encourage you to take the assessment, but first let's hear his coach training story.
How did you first hear about coach training?
Honestly, two things were happening. First, I had been hearing about the coaching paradigm for a few years and had some respected friends who raved about it, including some friends who had trained with Bridges Coaching, and it piqued my interest. Being a voracious learner and practitioner, I get excited to learn new leadership skills. Second, I was kind of frustrated with old ministry paradigms. I wanted to see people get breakthroughs, but realized the old discipleship paradigm of “telling” doesn’t work with every personality. Additionally, had been thinking about doing coach training fo...
This Just In - Commentary On Coach Training
In the Bridges Life Coach certification course, we use a variety of adult learning techniques, and one of them is online discussion. We share different questions throughout the learning process so the trainees can interact with the material and process it by restating it, or sharing how it applies in their own life situations.
Among other things, we share about topics like why it is often hard to trust that God has a plan, what it looks like to actively listen in a real life situations, or how to ask empowering questions.
The following comment came from a list-building question requesting input on honest reasons we like to retain control. The trainee's words are in blue and italics.
I take control because apparently I know what's best for everyone!! I never knew I was such a know-it-all all when it comes to other people's lives! But it is out of concern and wanting what is best for them.
I love the honesty here! Whether we acknowledge it or not, most of us do think we know what...
Two SIMPLE Phrases That Flip The Conversation To A Coaching Mindset
There is a skill set to coaching, to be sure, but more than a skill set, coaching is a mindset.
More than following a formula, coaching* has to do with a heart posture that believes God's Spirit endwells people and is guiding each of us on our own unique journey. A good coach is a thinking partner who offers a safe space to process your pathway out loud. They are cheerleaders and sometimes mirror holders. They believe in your ability to work through whatever life has thrown at you, to do new things, to work through obstacles, and to follow through when the going gets tough.
Two super simple phrases that can be a game-changer in a coaching session or a conversation.
1) Tell me more.
Tell me more - offers the person replying to go anywhere they want to go in what they share next. In fact, they may not even know until they keep talking what they need to "get out" there to discuss.
Proverbs 20:5 says, "People’s thoughts can be like a deep well, but someone with understanding can f...
Top Ten Things Coaching Is NOT!
Maybe it is easier to say what coaching is not.... Here's a top ten we use in coach training.
Top Ten Things True Coaching Is NOT! (as per the International Coaching Federation and the Christian Coaching Network International - check out the What Is Coaching Blog)
#10 Coaching is not “One-size-fits-all”. It is not a program or plan that the Coach designs and offers to all. Coaching is individualistic because it recognizes that what worked for one person may not work for the next. Each person has a unique design and pathway. Coaching helps uncover that plan.
#9 Coaching is not diagnostic. Good Coaches do not decide what the problem is or what the focus should be, they ask good questions and help the person being coached to come to an “Ah Ha” moment where they recognize something on their own.
#8 Coaching is not prescriptive. People often want someone to just tell them what to do. (I know there are plenty of times in my life when I have wanted that.) Coaching does not tell. Inste...
What Is Coaching? [The Skinny and The Blunt Truth]
"What is Coaching?" I whispered to the rep from Southwestern Christian University when I was considering getting my Master's there.* I was a little embarrassed that I didn't really know.
How about you? Coaching is a buzzword and has been steadily gaining popularity since I first asked that question over 15 years ago.
Webster's primary definition for coaching is the noun version - like Cinderella's coach, or a stagecoach from the Wild West. In that case, coaching is a means to get from one place to another - like our modern-day Uber or Lyft. The second definition Webster gives is "a tutor" or "one who instructs or trains".
Here's the blunt truth. No one owns the word "coach," and it is used differently by different people. The first thing that probably comes to most people's minds is some sort of sports coach, or maybe a skills coach that trains you in a specialty area. Some nutrition and fitness coaches would fall into this definition as well. These type of coaches have their own pa...
Before We Move On...
Last time we talked about R for Recognition on the Bridges Coaching ROAD and how the Discernment plays a crucial role there. (If you missed it, here's the link.)
I feel compelled to go a little deeper before we move on.
Taking plenty of time to establish the "Why" of the chosen destination (read goal) of the ROAD you are going down should not be downplayed.
Consider your potential goal and ask some of these questions:
- What will it cost me to follow through and complete this?
- What will completing it give me?
- If I don't do it, what will that cost?
- Who else will "pay" for this choice? Is it worth it for them?
- Is now the right time?
- What makes this important to me?
- How could this affect other areas of my life?
- Is there anyone I should talk this through with?
Some of these questions were included in the "P's to knowing God's will worksheet" in the first blog, but for those who may not have downloaded it I felt they should be included.
Perhaps it would be helpful to list s...