Which Her Do You See? (Relational perspectives that aren't really helpful.)
Ever heard of the word "infantizing"? If you haven't heard it, I can almost guarantee you have experienced it. It means treating someone like a baby or younger than they actually are.
It happens all the time, and especially in relationships that began with a caregiving aspect where one person is older, more experienced, or educated. Here are some examples.
- Parents have a difficult time allowing their adult children to make adult choices. It can vary anywhere from "Don't you want to wear a coat?" to "Are you sure you want to take out a loan to start that business?" Well-meaning questions that have a sense of "I-know-better" in them.
- Leaders who were there when someone first came to faith. In this relationship, it is more difficult to know when a person is no longer a "baby". These interactions sound like, "Wanna know what I would do if I were you?", or maybe they are not even questions at all - they are tells. "You can't be angry like that anymore," or "You need to forgive."
- Older ...
Build Disciples not Dependents
In the famous Great Commission verse, Jesus challenges his followers to “go and make disciples of all nations” (Matthew 28:19). In its simplest definition, a disciple is a follower of Jesus. So how do we go about making disciples like Jesus asked us?
One way is to follow Paul’s advice in 1 Corinthians 11:1 which says, “And you should imitate me, just as I imitate Christ.” This verse comes right after 1 Corinthians 10 where Paul talks about how to decide whether to eat meat offered to idols or not. Notice he doesn’t say whether people should or shouldn’t but rather he gives guidelines about how to make good decisions.
"Encouraging builds disciples, telling builds dependents."
We don’t really have the option to eat meat sacrificed to idols in our society, but we do have plenty of other decisions to make that may be questionable to some people. Encouraging people to make their own decisions is a great way to make disciples, not dependents.
Disciples look to God to guide their conscien...
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