Adult Parenting Is Not For The Weak! (Neither is being parented when you are an adult.)
Remember those midnight feedings?
And then there were the school challenges with sports, or friends, or academics...
Then came the dating years - few of us were ready for that!
But NOW many of us are facing parenting our adult kids - if that is even a thing. They hardly need parenting anymore, except for when they do!
When dealing with your adult children's decisions affects our well-being, we need to take notice and have a plan that will benefit us all.
Here's the thing. There's really no such thing as adult children. It's an oxymoron. Either you are an adult or a child, but all too often the perspective gets confused and we can't stop treating our adult children as actual children.
The parent feels it is their duty to guide (control) the adult child when they are making decisions they don't approve of, and the adult children feel they should be allowed to make their own choices and live with the consequences.
It's a pickle.
What if you could ask your...
How Is "Benevolent" Detachment Actually Benevolent? BD #3 of 5
The definition of benevolent includes words like kind and well-meaning. They sound like Jesus words to me, but how can "benevolent" be paired with "detachment" and still be kind and well-meaning?
Think of it this way.
Someone calls our church with a need for rent money. We have a certain protocol we walk through before helping out and one of the questions we need answered is whether or not we have helped in the past. Imagine if someone could just call every month and we just paid their rent for them. Would that be good for them?
Instead, we offer financial coaching. We want to help people have gainful employment, manage their finances, and set them up for a more secure future.
We want to help them learn to fish instead of just giving them a fish.
We are playing the long game.
It's easier, and in truth feels more rewarding, to just give the fish, pay the rent, meet the need, make the decision, give the guidance, soothe the pain...
It's better, and in...
The ONE Question Crux of Coaching!
Ever wish you had the golden question?
The single bullet question to clarify everything?
Well, today is your lucky day!
This question is too easy, but the hardest question you'll ever answer, and one you will be asking and answering the rest of your life.
True coaching, for yourself or others, is based on this one single probe!
Ready?
2 Thessalonians 1:11-12 spells it out for us!
"So we keep on praying for you, asking our God to enable you to live a life worthy of his call. May he give you the power to accomplish all the good things your faith prompts you to do. Then the name of our Lord Jesus will be honored because of the way you live, and you will be honored along with him. This is all made possible because of the grace of our God and Lord, Jesus Christ."
Did you see it?
WHAT IS YOUR FAITH PROMPTING YOU TO DO?!
This passage is so beautiful and SO CHALLENGING!
Let's break it down a bit. There are two kinds of prompts.
1) General prompts - these are for all...
But Really ~ What's Holding You Back? (2 ways to use this empowering question)
When thinking about a decision it can be helpful to weigh the pros and cons. Personally, I like to write them out and then take them to an "altar" in prayer and talk to God.
I say something like, "Here we go God, this is what I can see, but you know it all. Help me choose wisely and guide me with Your Spirit!"
Sometimes, I think He gives me the choice myself and encourages me to just decide, and sometimes I feel a certain sense of what I should do. Occasionally, He drops something in my mind or heart that is new information that helps guide me toward the wise choice.
Then, I ask myself this question: What's holding you back?
If the honest answer is fear of any kind: fear of the unknown, fear of how I will perform, or fear of first (I've never done anything like this before), then I calm my soul and ask God for the courage to say "yes".
I can not let fear guide my life choices.
As promised, there are two ways you can use this empowering question.
1) You can use this...