Top Ten Things Coaching Is NOT!
Maybe it is easier to say what coaching is not.... Here's a top ten we use in coach training.
Top Ten Things True Coaching Is NOT! (as per the International Coaching Federation and the Christian Coaching Network International - check out the What Is Coaching Blog)
#10 Coaching is not “One-size-fits-all”. It is not a program or plan that the Coach designs and offers to all. Coaching is individualistic because it recognizes that what worked for one person may not work for the next. Each person has a unique design and pathway. Coaching helps uncover that plan.
#9 Coaching is not diagnostic. Good Coaches do not decide what the problem is or what the focus should be, they ask good questions and help the person being coached to come to an “Ah Ha” moment where they recognize something on their own.
#8 Coaching is not prescriptive. People often want someone to just tell them what to do. (I know there are plenty of times in my life when I have wanted that.) Coaching does not tell. Instead, coaching comes alongside a person and helps them consider possible options and create action steps.
#7 Coaching is not enabling, in the bad sense of the word. Coaches help people move forward and do not encourage them to become dependent on their Coach. A good Coach is empathetic and caring while encouraging and challenging the person being coached to take ownership of their choices and their future.
#6 Coaching is not distant. Some people may consider the relationship between the Coach and the person being coached to be kept within certain professional parameters, where the Coach simply asks powerful questions but remains somewhat aloof personally. Good Coaching however, involves a connected caring relationship that has history, depth, celebration, and challenge as parts of a greater whole.
AND coaching is not simply used in, or reserved for, actual coaching sessions. Coaching can be used in your everyday conversations and relationships.
#5 Coaching is not New Agey. Just because Coaching is different for each person does not mean that “all roads lead to God”. God always offers a plan that aligns with His word- a certain and personal pathway for each individual that He wants to reveal through individual engagement with Him regarding each topic, issue or incident.
#4 Coaching is not easy. There couldn’t be anything further from the truth. It takes courage to address those areas of your life where you feel torn about a certain decision or where you just feel stuck. Coaching is a strong way to move forward. Coaching by definition, involves action steps and forward movement. If there isn’t something happening, then something is missing.
#3 Coaching is not repetitive or boring. If you think Coaching is a place where you just come and report your progress or lack thereof, you are completely missing the point. Good Coaching addresses the whole person and always has a next goal and new action steps in mind after the current ones have been accomplished.
#2 Coaching is not irrelevant. Coaching could not be more relevant or individualistic. It is not going through a book or plan, though those may be included, but rather is a highly personal, engaging, forward-moving package. Coaching fits the person being coached because they are doing the driving, not a pre-packaged plan.
#1 Coaching is not common! We live in a world where leaders often just tell their people what to do. There may or may not be buy-in from the individuals involved. Coaching involves trust building, risk taking, forward movement, complete buy in and Coaching produces movement.
Michael Hyatt, President and CEO of Thomas Nelson Publishers says, “Everyone talks about leadership. Few talk about coaching. Yet, this is the missing paradigm that makes good leaders great.”
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