Coaching Tools And How They Can Help
All good coaching allows the person being coached to choose their pathway, and most good coaching allows the "client" to choose the goal.*
But what happens when the person being coached really isn't sure how to move forward? Maybe they don't know what goal they want, or maybe they aren't sure how to take steps forward. Let's take a look at both scenarios.
1) Choosing a goal
At Bridges, we share three ways to choose a goal. The first is a tool called the Bridges Coaching Wheel of Life. It offers a personal evaluation process that provides a well-rounded view of a person's satisfaction in various areas of their life. Click the green link above for your FREE copy. We also offer an expanded version in our Life On Purpose personal workshop or the Traction book.
The second is taking a dream out of the "dream cloud," planting it in the ground, and tending it. That could mean anything from a project like writing a book to adding on to your home, or pursuing an education or a promotion. The possibilities are endless, but that idea will remain stuck in a dream cloud without intentionality.
And the third would be to drill down into a mindset that has been crippling. We talk about this in our Freedom Prayer prompts
Quality coaching must have a chosen goal, just as a pathway needs a destination.
2) Determining next steps
Sometimes there are so many options that it is difficult to know which to choose. A key here could be using curiosity to see what is holding the choice back. Is it truly indecision? Is there a fear involved? Is time a factor? Does a lie need to be removed? Moving forward here may include slowing down to identify the obstacle and determining how to remove it.
However, sometimes options are unclear, and tools can be helpful. It's important to remember that tools should be offered as options rather than assigned. Asking open questions to see if there are valuable insights in the exercise is key.
Here are some possible options:
- Making a more/less list. What does the person want more of or less of in their preferred future? Making such a list can give insight into making a quality decision in transition. It can also offer an awareness of gratefulness that was not easily recognized beforehand.
- Using the 4 helpfuls. What's right? What's wrong? What's missing? What's confusing? Shout out to Tom Paterson's STRATOP process.
- Processing pros and cons of a decision. Simply starting a chart like this can provide a place to park thoughts rather than have them swirling around.
- Using the yes/no question series. In his book, "The Coaching Habit," Michael Bungay-Stanier cites this question in his proposed series, "If you say 'yes' to that, what are you saying 'no' to? We've added our own morph of this question to include
- If you say 'no' to that, what are you saying 'yes' to?
- If you say 'no' to that, what are you saying 'no' to?
- If you say 'yes' to that, what are you saying 'yes' to?
That is a lot of yes/no questions. Perhaps the right one from that set would do the trick, but there may be insights in the full set.
As believers, we must remember that making quality choices is not about what we want most, what has the most pros and the fewest cons, but rather about discerning, with our eyes wide open, how God is leading us.
Using one or more of these tools could provide the lift needed to get a goal moving in the right direction.
Coach training helps people help people.
Is there someone in your life you keep having the same conversation with? What if coach training could make a difference?
*The exception to this would be direct reports when the leader needs to choose the goal, but the direct report is given license to choose how best the goal could be accomplished.
Not on the blog list yet? Click here for our Hundred+ Helpful Questions and to sign up for the Bridges blog.