How The Escape Room Craze Smacks of the Coaching Quest!
In Bridges Coaching one of the foundational tools we use is called the Always Circle. It is built on these three statements:
- There is always going to be stuff.
- God always offers a plan.
- We always make choices.
See the three "always" in there. Hence the name, Always Circle.
One of the reasons we are intrigued by Escape Rooms is that we know there is a solution and we want to see if we can figure it out.Â
Coaching can be like that - if we believe in God.
We have some sort of "stuff". We need to make a decision, or we need a pathway to move forward. We want healing. We're looking for connection. There is something in our life that requires attention and we are hoping for resolution.
In an Escape Room setting, we know that there IS a way out. Others have gone before us. the quest is to figure it out in a certain amount of time and "escape" from the room.
In a Coaching conversation, the parameters are similar. Let's take a look at the parts of the Always Circle again.Â
Ident...
3 Scenarios When Telling IS Better Than Coaching
Coaching isn't for everyone all the time, but it likely is the most underused tool in the adult learning process.
Let's start with a couple of quick definitions.
Telling is when one person has information the other needs and they pass it on. This is needed when the passer of information has knowledge or experience that is essential for the situation at hand.
Coaching has at least two definitions. The core of the word means to get from one place to another, like a stagecoach. Sports Coaches offer pathways to success by having their team execute a plan. Life Coaching is different.Â
Coaching is a conversational tool that empowers adult learning. It facilitates "Aha" moments of self-discovery. It uses questions and conversations to help people move from one place to another. Christian coaching acknowledges the Holy Spirit is always guiding people toward what God has uniquely for them.
Ever wish the people around you would "get it" and move forward.
Ever wish you could truly help peop...
When NOT to use coaching!
Coaching isn’t for everyone. There are at least three scenarios, or people groups, where coaching would not be a good fit.Â
#1) Ignorance or Immaturity
When someone is new to faith or unlearned in their faith walk it could be unkind to ask them questions beyond what they know or to leave them bumbling around when they simply need teaching.
People grow from discipling and teaching. They need help to know what quiet time looks like or how to study the Bible. They need to learn how kingdom ways are upside down from worldly ways. Selflessness does not come naturally to most.Â
Yet – even in the midst of these scenarios how a person walks out their response is best found in coaching questions.
What a healthy quiet time looks like is different from one person to the next, even how best to read the Bible has multiple quality options. Relating in right ways to others could mean patience or honest confrontation.
Teaching shares good options. Coaching helps people discern how God is leading...
Looking for MEANINGFUL gifts for your Gift List or Wish List?
I may regret this, but hey ~ it's Christmas!
I just decorated early. I think because I want some sort of do-over for last year... I want to celebrate fully and connect deeply and I want to GIFT MEANINGFULLY!
So, here's the offer.
Check out our Bridges Product page for your Gift List OR your Wish List.
Use the code MEANINGFULGIFT for all our products* for 15% off till Dec 1!
That includes everything from our video workshops all the way up to our certification courses! We haven't had a deal like this EVER!
It's worth the click to check it out and remember, use the code MEANINGFULGIFT for the discount.Â
Have fun shopping! (and if you purchase a gift remember to use the contact info for the person you are gifting to!)
Thankful for each of you and ready to celebrate!
Cindy
*Books from Amazon excluded (I couldn't figure out how to make a coupon for that - they are fairly inexpensive anyway...)
"Coaching for Dummies" with 3 Simple Questions
I have no idea if this book is any good, maybe you should give it a try, or we can cut to the chase and you can work with some version of these three simple questions.
- What are you hoping will happen?
- What are your options?
- What will you do?
We all do it.Â
We have a compulsion to be "tellers". Our hearts are probably right. We want to help people toward solutions. We want to save them the pain we had to walk through when we dealt with their "thing". We want to expedite the process.
But it's not the Jesus way.
Jesus asked us to make disciples, not dependents. That's really the heart of coaching. When we ask questions instead of teaching or telling we empower people to learn to discern God's voice in their own lives.Â
Here's how that works.
Recently I was talking with a co-worker who needed some advice. She was dealing with a tricky situation she needed to confront.Â
- I could have told her my stories of how I confronted situations like that in the past.
- I could have given ...
? Discipleship, Leadership Development, Coaching and Spiritual Formation ?
How should we grow? How will we know?
This is a time of redefining norms for our world and for the church.
As we move through this season - people are coming back to church in person, or not. People are getting back to relationships they once invested in, or not. People are sticking with new habits they formed, or not. People are pursuing plans they once had, or not.
There's a lot to navigate.
For me personally, I would love it if God just gave us a step-by-step plan that we could follow, and then we would KNOW we were doing "it" right!Â
I would love that full confidence and embrace the challenge to do all the things.
Turns out that is not how He designed our faith walk to be.
Well, not exactly.
The truth is He does have a step-by-step plan for us, but it is an individual path. You probably know the verse as well as I do, but Psalm 119:105 says, "Your word is a lamp to guide my feet and a light for my path."
I wish He would just give us a list and we could check stuff off item...
The ONE Question Crux of Coaching!
Ever wish you had the golden question?Â
The single bullet question to clarify everything?
Well, today is your lucky day!
This question is too easy, but the hardest question you'll ever answer, and one you will be asking and answering the rest of your life.
True coaching, for yourself or others, is based on this one single probe!
Ready?
2 Thessalonians 1:11-12 spells it out for us!Â
"So we keep on praying for you, asking our God to enable you to live a life worthy of his call. May he give you the power to accomplish all the good things your faith prompts you to do. Then the name of our Lord Jesus will be honored because of the way you live, and you will be honored along with him. This is all made possible because of the grace of our God and Lord, Jesus Christ."
Did you see it?
WHAT IS YOUR FAITH PROMPTING YOU TO DO?!
This passage is so beautiful and SO CHALLENGING!
Let's break it down a bit. There are two kinds of prompts.
1) General prompts - these are for all believers the...
April's Quest! What's Your Next?
As I sat down to write this blog many times, I ended up getting interrupted by one of my 4 girls, my phone reminding me of the demands of life… or the laundry buzzer cutting through any ounce of concentration.Â
Here I am though at 12:08 am determined to blog away. It’s finally quiet and time to introduce myself.
I could tell you about my really awesome husband, our girls that keep life exciting, the different jobs I work from home or the other important things (well, I sure think they are important) that I do.Â
But, really, if there is one thing I want people to hear about, it’s how God poured His love into my heart at a young age, won my affection for life and silenced all wondering in my seeking teenage girl’s heart. He laid a solid foundation of acceptance that has stood strong through many storms.
Because I have experienced such security, I can’t help but want to see others enjoy that freedom as well. What a privilege it is to be loved so perfectly and be able to love.Â
I ha...
Saboteurs Whisper To Us All... Can you identify their voices?
Saboteurs whisper to us all, they sound like friends, they seem wise, but they infiltrate our minds like a poison that tastes sweet.
Discipleship saboteurs say things like,
- if you don't tell them what to do, they will mess things up, it's just the responsible thing to do
- it will take too long for them to move forward with coaching, they would be better off if you just tell them what to do
- it's wrong for you to withhold your story if you went through whatever they are going through, they should learn from your mistakes and do it just like you
The best poison is only a small percent deadly, but if you take it in you will eventually die...
Using coaching as the Biblical way of discipleship helps people build their own relationship with God.Â
Coaching builds disciples not dependents.
Coach training can teach you how!
Saboteurs whisper their hopelessness on the other side of coaching as well. Coaches have helped me discern many of the following as limiting beliefs that needed t...
Did You Make Sarah's Mistake? (The Truth About Coaching!)
“Coaching?! I bet I’d be great at coaching! I love when people come to me for the answers to figure out their life. Because, to be honest, most people’s lives are messed up and I usually know what they should do...”
I look back and laugh now, but I’m pretty sure that was basically my thought when I first heard about coaching. People who are bad at managing their life hire someone to manage it for them, right??
Boy, did I have some perspectives shift over the next few years!
Let me tell you a little of my coaching journey:
I took my first coaching course, Coaching Culture, because of a desire to help other people. But I needed help first.
- I needed to learn to let go - to trust that God is speaking to everyone and that they can hear Him for themselves.
- I had to release my “need to be needed” and recognize that the best coaching empowers and gives support for growth.
- I needed to learn how to listen, how to REALLY listen, with curiosity, insight, and trust, not just analyzing to ...