3 Scenarios When Telling IS Better Than Coaching
Coaching isn't for everyone all the time, but it likely is the most underused tool in the adult learning process.
Let's start with a couple of quick definitions.
Telling is when one person has information the other needs and they pass it on. This is needed when the passer of information has knowledge or experience that is essential for the situation at hand.
Coaching has at least two definitions. The core of the word means to get from one place to another, like a stagecoach. Sports Coaches offer pathways to success by having their team execute a plan. Life Coaching is different.
Coaching is a conversational tool that empowers adult learning. It facilitates "Aha" moments of self-discovery. It uses questions and conversations to help people move from one place to another. Christian coaching acknowledges the Holy Spirit is always guiding people toward what God has uniquely for them.
Ever wish the people around you would "get it" and move forward.
Ever wish you could truly help people see all that God has for them.
Or, maybe you just wish you, yourself, could move on from a stuck place.
Coaching moves people from where they to where they want to go!
But, it's not always best. There are at least 3 scenarios when coaching is not the right tool to use!
#1 When someone is in imminent danger it's not time to ask questions.
If you are walking across a street with someone and they don't see the car coming, you don't ask them a question about how best to cross streets. You just grab their arm and pull them back to safety.
This instance could also apply when someone is in a sort of danger zone emotionally or situationally and they just need to be told. Maybe they are in an abusive situation and they can't see it, or maybe they have been the one acting out improperly. (There still may be a case for asking empowering questions in these situations, but sometimes there just needs to be a flat-out tell.)
#2 When someone needs to be taught a concept they need information, not coaching, at that moment.
There will always be a place for teaching. People who have knowledge have information that should be shared. Even then, after the sharing, there is a place for personal application that should be explored. Coaching is that exploration!
#3 When there is a new skill to acquire, a mentor or training approach works best.
At times people just need someone who has experience in whatever they are facing to show them what works. The trainer teaches them what to do in a certain way and often offers to stand by as they learn to do it themselves.
Even when learning a new skill, coaching could help in that each person may morph the process to best fit what they are doing.
In most instances, the best learning and growth comes from within, not without. That's why God asked Adam, "Where are you?" in Genesis. It wasn't because God didn't know, it was because God was offering an "Aha" moment to Adam. He wanted Adam to realize and admit he was hiding.
How about you? Are you offering "Aha" moments?
Do you need an "Aha" moment?
True coaching could be what you need next!
Bridges Coaching offers video training that explains the concepts of coaching, or for the truly interested our Life Coach Certification program has come alongside hundreds of lives and helped them personally understand what it means to move forward on their own personal journeys and gave them the tools to help others as well!
Is it time to join in?