Does True Coaching Include Coaxing?
Merriam-Webster defines coaxing as: the act of gently and persistently persuading someone to do something using patience, kindness, flattery, or encouragement. Instead of using force or coercion, it involves appealing to someone's emotions or offering small incentives to overcome their reluctance.
So, does coaching include coaxing? The answer isn't as clean-cut as you may think.
A coach is a thinking partner. Their job is to come alongside someone to provide a conversational space for them to move forward in an area the person chooses to focus on. Remember, the word coaching comes from the idea of forward movement. "Coaching" from one place to another - like a stagecoach took people from one place to another.
The person chooses to get coached to move from where they are to another place. That place could include anything from a specific project goal to a mindset shift, or from making a quality decision to walking through a transition or season well. Truly, any forward movement can benefit from good coaching.
Back to the concept of coaxing. Let's break it down a bit and revisit that definition.
Coaxing is the act of gently and persistently persuading someone to do something using patience, kindness, flattery, or encouragement. Instead of using force or coercion, it involves appealing to someone's emotions or offering small incentives to overcome their reluctance.
According to ICF standards, a coach would not persuade someone to do something they didn't want to do; however, they would challenge limiting beliefs and evoke awareness of obstacles that could be holding someone back. Using patience, kindness, and encouragement ARE encouraged coaching practices. Flattery would not fit the definition of good coaching; however, knowing your client's tendencies, personality type, and patterns of thinking, behavior, and reactions, and reflecting them back to the client could help them see what they want to continue or curtail.
Like coaxing, quality coaching would never use force or coercion, but it does take time to value the "why" behind the goal and would use insightful questions to partner with someone to overcome their reluctance, and even at times could encourage consideration of incentives someone may want to include in their planning as they hit milestones along their journey.
So, does true coaching include coaxing?
Everyone can benefit from quality coaching, and almost everyone can benefit from using coaching concepts in their everyday relationships and in their work.
Coach Training gives you the benefit of both being coached and learning how best to support others. If you are a parent or a pastor, a mother or a mentor, a small group leader at your church, or a team manager at work, coach training will level up your impact.
Check out these possibilities:
Video training - at your own pace, includes all the coach training video and a professionally printed notebook (does not include personal coaching, best done with a partner) $247 or see options for bulk training for your church or organization.
Life Coach Certification - includes processing with a peer partner and a trained facilitator, group classes with your cohort, lifetime access to the videos, personal live coaching, and the opportunity to experience your first coaching sessions as an active process in a coaching practicum. Also includes an in-depth notebook with project prompts, journaling, and more.
And now offering Leadership Coach Certification - If you have direct reports, this is the option for you. All of the above, with the addition of application in the workplace, as well as a personal prototype of the Bridges Planner Board for yourself, and to use with individuals on your team.