What Do Passivity, Fear, and Indecision Have In Common?
Most of us understand that to move forward, we have to ... well, move forward. We have to take steps in order to achieve movement on whatever path is before us.
What is harder to come to terms with are the ingrained beliefs (poisons)that can hold us back from said movement. Let's explore these thoughts together. See if you can identify which, if any, of the following thoughts you have had personal experience with.
- If God wanted it to happen, He would ______________. Maybe it is a vocational shift of some sort, and you are waiting for it to come to you. Maybe it's about a relationship you would like to see go deeper, but you are holding back till the other person makes a move. You get the picture. You want God to make something happen. (Of course, there are cases when one is called on to be patient, but let's make sure it is God doing the prompting and not simply a lack of initiative on our part.)
- Antidote: Look at the desire in your heart and ask God for grace to take the initiative needed to start moving. Think of the parable of the talents. God gave each of them a bag and expected them to do something with what they were given.
- What are you hoping for that you just need to take a step toward?
- I would _________________ but what if ______________. Fear of what could happen can cripple the best of us. Fear of failing. Fear of the cost - time, money, or effort. Fear of what others will think. The list could go on.
- Antidote: Face your fear. List it. Talk about it. "Defang" it. Perhaps consider embracing another motivator. What would you lose if you never even tried because you were afraid? At Bridges Coaching, we say, "Failure is good research." If you don't try, you may live your life wondering if you should have given it a go.
- What would it take for you to give it a try? What will it cost if you don't?
- But what if I'm just not sure? Indecision is insidious. It's like an infection that creeps into your mind and paralyzes you. The waffling is costly. People lose trust in what you have stated. You lose confidence in your ability to follow through.
- Antidotes: There are few here.
- Make a pros/cons list. Ask others for their additions to your list. Take the list to an altar of sorts and offer it to God. Ask Him for clarity and courage to make a quality choice.
- Choose a date when you will make the decision, put it on your calendar, and tell someone close to you. Begin a countdown as a reminder.
- Revisit regularly. Set a plan to check in, to step away, and see how things are going. Should you continue? Should you call it? Whatever you decide, talk to someone about it. If calling something off affects others, thank them for investing in the research and let them know you have decided against it.
- What have you been considering that you need to decide on?
- Antidotes: There are few here.
The third part of the Always Circle says, "We always make choices". The lie associated with it is, "There's nothing I can do. It's not my fault." The truth is we all make choices and being passive, afraid, indecisive are three choices we need to avoid.
Good Coaching serves as a thinking partner to help you move forward. Good Coach Training help you help others!
