Going From "Freeze Framing" To Reframing
Ever feel like someone put you on a hard pause when that "thing" happened? It's like they can't let you move forward. You feel marked forever as not able to do whatever you messed up on.
Or maybe you put yourself on a hard pause and said you will never try "that" again?
Or one more, maybe have you put someone else on a hard pause and in your heart thought "they can't really..."?
At Bridges Coaching, we call this Freeze Framing. It's like when you hit the pause button on a video and the person is stuck as they are, frozen, not able to move forward. The swirling thoughts are all negative and limiting. They don't allow for growth, change, or transformation.
I'll be honest. I have done it myself. I've wondered if I could finish projects, learn new skills, incorporate new habits, be more thoughtful, have patience, or be more...
I'm embarrassed to say that I've freeze framed others as well. I've not asked them to do something they weren't great at the first time, or avoided getting them involved in something they don't seem naturally gifted in.
Jesus was not a freeze framer!
He offered growth, change, and transformation! In fact, that is the message of the gospel, that we CAN be transformed.
Romans 12:2 says, "Do not be shaped by this world; instead be changed within by a new way of thinking. Then you will be able to decide what God wants for you; you will know what is good and pleasing to him and what is perfect."
At its core, this is what true coaching is all about!
Coaching helps remove freeze framing limiting beliefs so you can "be able to decide what God wants for you". When we limit ourselves, or others, we slip into a stuck place that God never intended for us to be in.
Reframing means that we break out of the freeze frame and move forward. Sometimes reframing even includes embracing a difficulty and asking God to use it for good rather than being stuck asking God why it happened.
Here's some actual places I have been able to move from freeze framing and to REFRAME!
- I'll never finish that book > I'll work on it bit by bit till it's ready to go. (It should come out in the next month!)
- I can't trust them with that project > I'll work with them and we can both grow together.
- I'll always struggle with self-doubt > I'll expose my fears and invite Jesus to teach me His ways.
- I am just too much for people > I'll be honest about how I feel or what I see and ask for feedback so I can learn and grow.
- I'm not attractive > I'm as attractive as I choose to be.
- They will never stop being like "that" > I'll treat them as though they can change and have clear boundaries in place while they are growing.
For more on reframing check out my dear husband's book by that same name - Reframing: Looking back and leaning in where he processes his life story through the lens of growth and faith.
Other resources that could help:
How to use the Freedom Prayer to work through Facts, Feelings, and Lies and then to Live out God's Truth in your life! (This one has a guided worksheet.)
Getting Rid of the Nagging Voice within... (This one is about identifying and removing limiting beliefs.)
Good Coaching help you identify goals and move from being stuck to being free! We can help you learn for yourself and to help others.
God, help us to see where we have believed limiting beliefs about ourselves or others and freeze framed. Show us your plan for transformation and growth. Lead us in the way you have for us - the way of hope and destiny!